Stop The Moment

Bang.

A Break From The Story

Oh God, don’t make me face up to this
And I so hate consequences
And running from you is what my best defense is
Cause I know that I let you down
And I don’t want to deal with that

And I spent all last night
Tearing down
Every stoplight
And stop sign in this town
Now I think there might
Be no way to stop me now
I’ll get away despite
The fact I’m so weighed down

All of my escapes have been exhausted
I thought I had a way but then I lost it
And my resistance was once much stronger
And I know I can’t go on like this much longer

When I got tired of running from you
I stopped right there to catch my breath
There your words they caught my ears
You said, “I miss you son. Come home”
And my sins, they watched me leave
And in my heart I so believed
The love you felt for me was mine
The love I’d wished for all this time
And when the doors were closed
I heard no I told so’s
I said the words I knew you knew
Oh God, Oh God I needed you
God all this time I needed you, I needed you

Running from you is what my best defence is.

Nah, not really.

The First.

This story HAD a happy ending; but now I’m leaving it open for the moment.

I bet all of you experienced the feeling where you want to just beg God why on earth He picked such a… odd person to love. Or maybe why He chose this person over that person when that person is so much better; and that person is available but this person isn’t.

And then when you’re brushing your teeth you hit the toothbrush on a ledge; the toothbrush pounds the back of your throat and then you understand God’s telling you not to bother trying to ask why, but it’ll work out for the better.

Life’s odd, isn’t it? Oh, the beauty of irony.

Let’s begin this story, then.

Once upon a time, in a land? not far away.. oh, wait, I think that’s from Star Wars.

Screw the fairytale starting then and let’s get to business~

She entered my life during a period where life was a breeze for me. You know, cruise along.. grades alright, friends are cool, parents aren’t grounding you every which way.. that’s the idea.

I’m sure some of my friends will be wondering why I keep writing about love. Well, it’s simple- love’s the only thing that’s perfect, isn’t it?

In this jacked up, screwed up world, we find perfection confusing and, well, retarded. It’s the same reason why we can’t understand love, and the things people in love do.

As a book I read said: “Never trust a person in love, unless the person’s in love with you.”

How true.

Love’s greatest enemy is not hate. Not people like Hitler (don’t you love his moustache?), nor people who make your heart and then break it (I HATE YOU MEGAN FOX).  I think love’s greatest enemy is those people who pretend- or think- they are in love, begin doing things that they think they should do, that people in love should do- but with the wrong motivation. Then they end up completely screwing the situation up- and they ask why.

Note: I’m not just talking about romantic love here. Brotherly and sisterly love kicks in as well.

Second note: To insert just a little tidbit of wisdom in here, it’s only in your head that you feel left out and looked down on.

Getting back to the story.

She was in need, you see.

Not in need of money, nor in need of love.

Yes, that’s right. NOT in need of love.

What she needed was just someone to show the right combination of character traits, to act in such-and-such a way, to do this and do that particular thing, so as to make her believe that this particular someone was trustable- and then she would open up.

I use the phrase “make her believe” because I think she was desperate enough for someone who could perform an act of a passable standard for her so she could tell him/her all the things she was experiencing.

Well, fine, you say that if we tweak that little we get she needed love.

Okay, I’m a confused person, okay? Well- to be frank- I have explored both sides of the.. coin, shall we say?

I’ll be back in a while; my father’s cutting the internet in a short while. Shall we say, ten seconds? See you all in a bit.

~With you.

*this is a STORY. Any words written in italics will be a story from now on. Any references to ANYONE, including myself, is purely unintended. Seriously.

oh really?

well, I BEG TO DIFFER.

My God, I’d have thought you would know how to differentiate self-delusion from reality by now.

explosions in the sky at night.

at least, in my sky.

Be still and know that I am GOD.

For every single one of you, PLEASE watch this. It’s so.. moving, and so true..

If you don’t mind me mentioning names, I want to dedicate this to:

Pearlyn

Greg

Jarrad

If you have problems with the names tell me I’ll take em off but watch the video. Seriously.

This is my prayer in the fire;

WHOO. SERVICE was awesome.

Pastor Kong’s birthday today! HAPPY BIRTHDAY PASTOR:D You bring us such joy and inspiration.

The sermon was super good too… utterly revelational. Obviously I won’t post anything here because some are too personal.. but yes. One thing I realized…

Strength is not facing the giant. Strength is GETTING UP after being struck down by the giant.

By the way. To another person. You know when I said that I’d always be ok? What I meant was, as Pastor Kong said, no matter what happens God would always give me the strength to get up and go again. In the end, I know it’ll all work out. Apply that too your life too!

Colors.

Woahhhh man.

God has confirmed that express is my new ninjaplace where He wants me to be.

So far, my results are:

Emath: 78.5% A1

History: 72.%, 76% in consideration A1 HOPEFULLY

Chemistry: 88.5% A1

English: 72% A2

SS: 56% (I never did like writing good stuff about Singapore)

And oh shoop, I got an honors day award for drama O.O So random! So I need to go get a white shirt. Or maybe I should wear my pink shirt.. and my pink disco tie.. hmmmmm.

Cos nothin’ is impossible

Hello!

Yes I know, spasmodic updates. Whatever!

I have a fever. ANNOYING. Dragged myself to church this morning then halfway through I realized I was burning up. And then tomorrow we’re playing for chapel and on Tuesday REW some more. I don’t care, Satan, you’re not getting me down. I’m gonna force myself to school tomorrow, play, take the History test (YES I KNOW T_T) and then come home. Same for Tuesday. Do or die

Luckily my parents are understanding.. they didn’t argue when I told them that I was going to school to play no matter what. Praise the Lord.

I FINALLY found the song that they were playing after service. Planetshakers, Nothing is Impossible. The lyrics are so fantastic! I’d post a link to a video here but there ARE NO VIDEOS Youtube, you fail me!

Anyway, I think I’m gonna get like someone to record our performance of All in All tomorrow and Tuesday. Our theme song was supposed to be Indescribable but since the chords were so jack we changed it to You’re my All in All. Then when we were playing it we were just fooling around, experimenting with the drumbeat.. the bassline.. and we came up with this totally AWESOME fast version. I think Fifi was playing the Dammit bassline (LOL) but it sounded pretty freaking good.

I’m supposed to do rhythm but being bored with guitar, I grabbed the mike and sang for that one.. tried to harmonize.. was quite LOL actually. Dave and Fifi said that I shouldn’t try to harmonize with Jem Ong cause our voices don’t suit each other but then for this song it turned out pretty freakin’ awesome. So I guess I’ll do vocals for this one. We’re gonna freaking ROCK the school!

The riff is oh-so-sexy!!

Been a totally tumultous week for me, many things happened, both good and bad.. relationships were destroyed, new friendships and bonds were forged.. trust was broken, pissed words exchanged… respect was lost for hypocritical people and respect gained for those who deserved it.

Ninjanauts has been activated.

This Love is Difficult, But It’s Real

CHC, HAPPY BIRTHDAY

I’m proud to be a member of this wonderful church.

I still recall the first time I stepped in- the Saturday service, and I was completely blown away by the music and the spiritual atmosphere.

The next time I went, I dragged Jarrad along, and we met PAULINE!!! Who then brought us to W417 where the first person I talked to was.. guess.. Gerald WONG! And of course his amazing eyebrows.

Since then I never have regretted coming over here. I’ve gone through a load of stuff since I arrived- okay, actually it isn’t too bad- and I’m holding on tight still, and will continue.

Service was amazing. There were quite a few points where I wanted to just cry, I was so moved. One of them was the one where Sun and Dayan were speaking on the video; it was just so touching.

“Well, here we are.. The two most important people in your life. This year has been difficult for us- only God knows what we’ve gone through- but everytime I feel like throwing in the towel, I can imagine what you will say- do it for God. And yes, I am doing it for God, Kong, but I want you to know that I’m doing it for you too.”

“CAN I COME DOWN NOW?”

Dayan is SO CUTE!! He sorta spoiled the mood though :S

Headed over to Bugis for lunch. Ate beef noodles. Was SUPERSUPERSUPER intimidated cause me and Zhengda were the only guys there- repeat of the Bukit Timah Hill thing, anyone?- and like… it was freaky:O

I finally bothered to go look up the Love Story Meets Viva La Vida song! Gosh it is soooo amazing. Jon Schmidt manages to inject such emotion when he plays it.

I can’t believe they pushed the exams to start on MY BIRTHDAY What a lousy present!

NICE IDEA GREG. And Mindy, PINK is NOT gay.

Thank you, God, for being there always. When I’m feeling down, you always yank me up and give me something to do to take my mind off my pain. And when I’m happy, you keep me soaring together with You. You’re the best friend I ever could have- always by my side, never giving up, always encouraging.

All those times in my room at night when everyone else is asleep- I treasure them well. When I have lousy days and I’m feeling so tired, so angry, so depressed, I pick up the guitar, sit on the bed, play a song, and I feel You right beside me. Every time I say the line that You’re all I need, when the tears start flowing, I am reminded that if all else is gone, I can survive on You alone- and that nothing can stop us when we’re together.

You’re my best friend and always will be.